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by Bruce Braun
“Gimmie: an agreement between two golfers who can’t putt.” Submitted by Dennis O’Sullivan.
Once again, mother nature has taken the upper hand and golf for today was canceled. There are a number of sad faces, mine included. I, however, must persevere. Producing a weekly news article without the benefit of news isn’t an easy task! Maybe I can get you to send me a picture of you doing a crossword puzzle or something? Despite the weather there are still some things for me to highlight. Read on. It’s not like you’re rushing to get outside to see if you’re gutters are overflowing or not.
The senior men’s matchplay is about to begin providing that the weather cooperates. 17 members have signed up for the season long competition. This is your last chance to get in on the action. Contact Dan Anderson or Keith Lake.
And now for a continuation of the multipart series on the gimmie. I am sending this as I received it so you may notice US references.
Part 2: Gimmies.
“Some guys are generous and hand out gimmies like after dinner mints, sometimes even before the lag putt has stopped rolling. I love these guys. They are the Mother Theresa’s of golf.
The other mothers of golf are the players who would rather donate a kidney than concede a putt. These are the guys who keep score in ink, who use a pocket calculator to split the lunch tab, and who believe a gimmie is an assault on the integrity of the game. Keep in mind, this is a game typically played by hackers in baggy shorts who have already taken two mulligans and several foot wedges just to survive the front nine. What integrity?
So, if you struggle with administering a gimmie, here are some helpful guidelines.
Daylight Savings Time
The foursome waiting in the fairway has been watching your group blast from one greenside bunker to another, chunk chips, plumb bob, and debate who putts next. This is more frustrating than waiting for a senior citizen to back out of a parking space at Walmart or watching Joe Biden trying to complete a sentence. Just grab your balls and get off the green. All putts are good.
Code Blue
You’re playing partner is on life support. He has landed in every bunker, splashed in every pond, and bounced off more trees than a squirrel on crack. You cannot bear to see him take another stroke. It is your civic duty to stop the bleeding and administer the Kevorkian gimmie. No range limitations in this case. If his ball is closer to the hole than to Akron Ohio, its good. Knock it away before he tries to hit it again.
Nothing at Stake
Pros putt out because they are playing for big money, coveted trophies, and trophy wives. For the average golfer, missing or making a short putt is more meaningless than a cup of decaf coffee or a political campaign promise. Give him the putt. There is no good reason not to.
Reward
The guy has stroked a winding 125 foot putt from just off the green to within three feet of the hole. Reward him. Let him pick it up. He earned it. It is better than watching him lip out, melt down, and try to disembowel himself with his putter.”
More to come next time. Have a good week. Stay dry!
A closing hook. All of us mark our golf balls on the green from time to time. Some of us do it all of the time if for no other reason than to clean any debris off of your golf ball. Marking your golf ball is considered good form. It is particularly considered important when your ball is in someone’s line. Coming soon to the BB senior men’s league newsletter is recognition of the good old days when touching your golf ball after you tee off from when the ball hits the bottom of the cup was forbidden. Enter the stymie! Is anybody in our league old enough to have played this rule? Marking the ball, as we do now when we are in someone’s line, didn’t take full effect until 1952.
